Disgruntled Horse Trainer

I haven't written in a few days, the reason being that I seem to be at a crossroads of sorts, and due to inner conflict, I can't decide on a direction for my inane ramblings here.

On one hand, I want to be *Helpful Trainer*, and offer whatever assistance I can to anyone who might read and grasp my concepts; hopefully, they may include some of my helpful hints into improving their relationship with their horse.

On the other hand, my alter ego *Disgruntled Trainer* keeps whacking me upside my head as a reminder that HT is wasting her time writing helpful hints because (based upon 35+ years of experience) only horses learn... their people rarely do.

I'm not talking about people who send their youngsters for the basics, or competition horses sent for training in order to achieve their full potential and performance goals... these are the type of people I trained for during my primary career, and with very few exceptions, they "got it" and were delightful clients.  

No, I'm speaking of my semi-retirement gig training backyard trail and pleasure horses (aka: Magic Unicorns) for almost 13 years.
I was shocked at the disparity between my previous clients (who generally were knowledgable horsemen themselves), and my 'new breed' of client (mostly novice middle-aged women living in unicorn dreamland, who either cannot or will not learn).     

"Disgruntled" feels that "Helpful" is drinking her bathwater if she thinks she'll make any difference whatsoever by attempting to transfer knowledge to the typical backyard horse owner via the internet, when they've already proven in real-life that (except in a few cases) my efforts to educate them are mostly futile.
They just can't seem to let go of their little girl dreams and misconceptions about horses.
I mean, let's face facts... If the vast majority of people who actually sought me out, paid me money, and worked with me one-on-one in real life failed to absorb enough information to really make a difference, why should I expect any different here?

As you know, insanity is loosely defined as making the same mistake over and over again while expecting different results... making me certifiable for even attempting to educate equally insane horse owners when I know in advance that the exercise (statisically) will fail miserably.

Not in ALL cases of course, but the odds against success are high enough that it's disheartening and frustrating.

*Disgruntled* strongly feels that the unicorn dreamers need a reality check... and wants to shock them into the real-world by blowing the horse industry out of the water (or at least holding it's head under for awhile).... you cannot possibly imagine the things I've seen in my life as a horse professional.

Speaking as "Disgruntled", I've been publically called an egotistical braggart, a self-appointed know-it-all, a rude bitch, and much worse by thin-skinned people with their panties in a wad when I did nothing more than point out the TRUTH to them (nothing hurts fragile feelings worse than having the truth hit home).
Of course, my "truths" are just my opinions, but I feel I have good reason to be considered an expert in my field, and a credible source of sound information.

Did you marry, raise children, pursue a career outside of horses?

If so, I know nothing of your lifestyle.

While you were raising your family in suburbia and working 9 to 5, I was travelling the country and learning from thousands (yeah, thousands) of horses and their trainers, vets, farriers, riders, grooms, and stall-muckers... they ALL had good information to share.

My life's work has been a total devotion to learning as much about horses as I possibly could absorb from both the best and the worst in the business.
I've lived and breathed horses, and horses have been my ONLY passion in life.

I did it the old fashioned way too... I spent over 30 YEARS living in tackrooms and stables with the horses, sleeping on hay bales covered with horse blankets, seeing the USA from the windows of a horse van (and learning the different ways people keep horses according to their geographic locations).

Name a breed or discipline, and I've at least tried it.

I served years of apprenticeships, working outlandish hours (even on Christmas and other "holidays") under a variety of successful trainers (including 3 Hall of Famers), slowly working my way up the ladder in my primary career of racing until I had a successful stable, a good name, and a wealth of knowledge gleaned from practical hands-on experience.

I rode races as a jockey for 22 years, starting during a time when women were not welcome at the track and had to fight tooth and nail to survive... and yes, I mean it literally.
It taught me to not allow my feelings to be hurt just because some jerk cussed me out... or worse.     

I attended school part-time taking pre-vet animal science courses to improve my knowledge of how horses function physically, and served as a Vet Tech to one of my best friends in his all-equine practice for 12 years while also riding races and training a stable of racehorses.

I earned my certification as an Equine Nutritionist, and worked for 18 months as a consultant and developer for a regional feed manufacturer.

I earned my Trainer's License at a major California track at age 27... and getting a track trainer's license is totally different from a pleasure or show trainer, who aren't tested for their experience or knowledge, and need only to paint themselves a sign to be "in business". 
A licensed track trainer has to pass a series of 3 tests... oral, written, and practical... none of them easy.
I'm extremely proud of the fact that I was the very first person (male or female) to EVER pass those tests with 100% scores on EVERYTHING.  The stewards told me so. 
This means I outscored famous trainers such as Charlie Whittingham (who was one of my mentors).

Once I achieved the goal of attaining my trainer's license, I was a tri-license holder... the first person ever in the history of racing to simultaneously hold Owner, Trainer, and Jockey licenses (they actually had to rewrite a rule of racing to accomodate the new catagory).

I could go on and on and on... but those are some of my basic qualifications... my (very abbreviated) "resume" so to speak. 

Am I an egotistical braggart blowing my own horn?
You bet your ass I am, but I believe I have earned the right through my blood, sweat, and tears... my singular lifelong dedication to becoming knowledgable about horses... not many can say that.

Unfortuneately, citing my merits tends to alienate people of fragile sensibilities, causing them to disregard me as a *blow hard*; when in actuality, my extensive profile along with a long list of successes should increase my credibility rather than diminish it.
At least it would for me... I guess I just don't understand people or how they think.

Many people don't want to hear of your education, experience, and success (things that prove your worthiness to speak with authority on a topic)... but being humble, and without them knowing your background and experience, what is their basis for choosing to believe that you know what you're doing? 

I believe that success in dealing with unicorn huggers relies on *sugarcoating* and *showmanship*... not on actual experience and knowledge.  

*** As an aside for comparison:
I read Clinton Anderson's "resume" not long ago.
Did you know he apprenticed under one guy for a few years, tried to start-up his own training biz (which failed), went back to work for that same guy again, and after a trip to the USA revealed how gullible the American people are, he finally began doing what he does best... public speaking and showmanship.
C.A. is a very talented horse trainer... probably one of the best out there today... but his knowledge and experience come from a single source (his sole mentor), and a singular riding discipline...not from a plethora of different trainers, methods, and disciplines.
Based upon this (and with all sexy cuteness aside), I'd have to rate him as a trainer of "average" practical experience.
His success comes from his SHOWMANSHIP and SALEMANSHIP more than any other factors. 

I believe that many of our most beloved clinicians and trainers also fit into this type of experience profile... they have one method, learned from one mentor, and it's all they know.

In contrast, I've meshed the teachings of many different trainers, horse breeds, and disciplines... and know there is NO ONE METHOD that is "best" for training horses.

"My Way" always works because I have no set-in-stone method... "my way" changes constantly according to the horse and the circumstances.

This is also why I never made videos, wrote books on training, or became a clinician... it realistically can't be done because a real horse trainer MUST be flexible and vary his or her methods as the individual horse requires.
You cannot teach novices to be horse trainers using videos and clinical settings that promote a singular "method" of horse handling... it just doesn't work.

I'm well aware of my flaws because I'm a REALIST who can critique myself as harshly as any of my detractors can... without getting my feelings hurt. 
I'm not particularily "people friendly", and have lousy communication skills.
I blow my own horn, brag endlessly, and annoy people to the point where they want to slap me... or worse.

BUT those who actually listen and absorb what I say, usually find themselves in a better place with their horses and their riding... even if they dislike me on a personal level.

So there it is...
"Helpful" is currently being shoved aside here by "Disgruntled", who thinks she has something of value to say, and demands to be heard.

"Helpful" fears that "Disgruntled" will alienate readers, but she's a sugar-coated wuss... 
"Disgruntled" told me so.

"D" actually has valuable information to share, but lacks the communication skills to convey it to people who are "fragile"... she believes in delivering information in the same manner it was delivered to her by her own mentors... straight-up, and with the chips falling where they may... no sugarcoating.

Separate the wheat from the chaff, so to speak.

Sooooo... I'm considering allowing "D" to write from time to time, and hopefully she won't just take over and run "H" out of town, but we'll see.

If you have any objections to "D" speaking her mind, let me know, and I'll figure out a warning system to let you know when she's writing so you can skip reading that day... wouldn't want to hurt anyone's feelings, ya know.